tired midwest parents

Are you counting the days? Are you looking forward to the silence and space? Are you lamenting the time lost to the weather and wavering plans? Will you miss the road trips and lazy afternoons?

Back to school signifies a great shift for all families. Whether it’s a return to family routines or a sigh of relief may depend on the age of the children and the personal goals of the parents. As the first day back approaches, it seems like a good time to take a step back. Take a moment to prepare for your sake and sanity, and to ensure you can be present for however they respond to the change that comes with a new year, a new class, a new teacher.

Patience

Tough, but possible. Will they show signs of separation anxiety or will they be generating massive amounts of pent up energy that explodes into the universe as they are reunited daily with their friends old and new? Don’t forget to maintain that time for yourself, however brief. A moment in the car before pick up. A cup of coffee in a sliver of down time. 15 minutes of a workout you’ve been putting off that can reset our energy. Come ready for those after school conversations and return to “normal” schedules.

Curiosity

How many questions are too many questions? My kids like questions, almost as much as they like quesadillas. Some days, however, they have no interest in recounting their days for us. Don’t give up. Change the question. Shift the focus. Leave some room for them to come to you. If you’re getting nothing, fine. Tomorrow is another day. Plant a seed in the morning, follow up at night. Build that dialogue. It’s fun to hear the world from their perspective, once they’re willing to share it.

Sleep

Continue to try and get as much as you can. Skip a night of binge watching something that keeps you up too late. Put the book down. Let go of what you’re insistent upon “getting done”, because if you haven’t completed that checklist by bedtime you’ve already either procrastinated or overbooked yourself. It’s ok. Do better tomorrow. Before the sun goes down, though.

Stories

Storytelling and sharing your experiences will shape them as much as their own at times. Share your passions. Celebrate their discoveries. Challenge them to understand the “why?” Discourage negativity. Reward kindness. Offer perspective, and explain accountability as a good thing. Spend what time you can building something together, a tangible connection over the dinner table, homework, or a fun project.

Boredom

Let them be bored. Let them struggle to find things to do with themselves. Don’t make them feel bad for being bored, but challenge them to do something. Anything. Build. Write. Draw. Sing. Dance. Read. Stretch. Run. Play. Create. Whatever drives them to those moments like you remember camped out in your own room years ago passing the time within the worlds you created. If they fail, let them sit. Let them sleep. Let them be bored.

School is back. I’m grateful for the little bit of freedom that it offers. I’m hoping some of the structure sticks and benefits the whole family. I recognize that I’ll play a role in the success or otherwise of this first week or so back and the emotional toll I’ll let it take on me. Oddly enough, regardless of the outcome, I’m looking forward to it.

Good Luck.

-Tired Midwest Parent